Most of us have been here. It looks a little like this:
Weight loss (quit). Smoking cessation (quit). Degree program (quit). New job (quit). Relationship (quit). And YES sometimes even Hypnotherapy (quit).
In the beginning we want it so badly. We set forth gallantly toward something so well within our reach we can see it, feel it, taste it, smell it, touch it – as if it is happening now in HIGH DEFINITION. The image is so vivid; so colorful; so bright – so exciting and playful. It is as if the volume is set to home theater/surround sound. For a while, everywhere we go, we experience a dramatic echo – a sort of emotional resonance between what we imagine and the foreshadowing of things to come.
And then we crash.
After all, a goal takes work, discipline, structure, physical and emotional stamina, mental reprogramming and (oh yeah) time. Up close, all these things look and feel more like handcuffs, shackles and restraints – as our focus shifts to all the things we must give up in order to achieve this greater state of being.
Every step feels like pure bone on bone – no cushion, no bounce, no buoyancy. We came to this place expecting a sprint and encountered a marathon. This is uncomfortable, too much, too loud, too restricting and really rather self-sacrificial. It begins to feel as if everything around us is plotting against us – the spouse, the job, the kids, the time of year, the position of the earth in the planetary system.
We wonder why we cannot hold steady the same level of enthusiasm we felt at the onset of this journey; why we give up on ourselves and our dreams so easily and without a good fight. All we know is that THIS is clearly NOT what we signed up for. And then – like a slow leak, we feel our enthusiasm drain out through the soles of our feet.
Wonders never cease as we allow our mind to travel right to the epicenter of our negative monologues. Add in any other kind of demotivators – situational depression caused by a recent loss; unstable home environment; unhealthy marriage/partnership; consistent environmental stress of living with alcoholic/addict; chronic job dissatisfaction; financial strain – and a whole host of other factors – and you always seem to find a way to burrow in to your uncomfortable, yet familiar circumstances.
So, here’s a few nuggets of wisdom to “flip the switch” from chronic quitter to heavy hitter and it begins with your thoughts….
“As long as it takes…”
Goals and timelines are great, but sometimes you just need to embrace the process or journey without hyper-focusing on the benchmarks or outcome/results you think you should achieve in a few weeks or months. Sometimes we focus so much on that “one thing” we desire that we lose sight of other significant shifts that need to occur gradually over time. There are NO SHORTCUTS to achieving our greatest goals in life.
“Drop the injury and cull out the wisdom.”
It is unrealistic to assume the journey to success does not involve backsliding. We all backslide from time to time, but that doesn’t mean you’re a failure and should quit. These trials are sometimes a necessary part of gaining clarity and wisdom – and of strengthening your strategy or plan of attack. And as for the shame or disappointment you feel for temporarily losing control – LET IT GO, because all the quicker you can get back on track. So brush yourself off; give yourself a mental “pep talk”; find a temporary, healthy and invigorating distraction and get back at it!
“I will remain consistent through every season.”
So many clients have said “I saw so many more changes in the beginning, but now that my progress has plateaued, I’ve lost my motivation.” This is called the “Honeymoon Effect.” Everything is so much more appealing when it’s new, shiny and offers some sort of instant gratification. However, just like so many things worth investing in, it’s important to keep a consistent system in place, even through the challenging seasons. Nothing in life can give us an endorphin rush all the time -so work toward integrating some balance in your life.
“I am not a victim.”
Your partner, your life circumstances, your divorce, your income, your health, your parents, your job, your disposition, and every other little and big distraction in your life has so much less to do with your outcome than the power of your own mind and choices. Stop giving your power away to forces that aren’t really trying to take you down and take charge of your own destiny.
You are only human – so just like anything else in your life, when you initiate change, you are going to move through a variety of seasons and emotions – fear, discouragement, frustration, joy, excitement, etc. Just be at peace knowing that many of the choices you make now – though not always immediately gratifying – will have a tremendous cumulative and long-lasting impact on your desired outcome later. Learn to trust the process and cultivate some emotional buoyancy.
To learn how Hypnosis can help remove unwanted behaviors, click here: (1) How to Remove Unwanted Behaviors Without Months or Years of Talk Therapy. My Three Program Secrets. – YouTube
For free “I AM” Positive Affirmations, click here: (1) I AM POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS FOR RELEASING TRAUMA AND ATTRACTING ABUNDANCE – YouTube
- Why Having Too Much Anger or Too Little is Bad for Your Health - November 25, 2023
- 5 Essential Techniques for Quieting the Trauma Response Pattern - November 7, 2023
- 7 Tips to Tackle Negative Self-Talk - May 1, 2023